"Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly"
If there's 1 thing I could say to all my clients and it would fit and be applicable across the board, it would be: Forget "normal".
Chasing "normal" will cause you to lose sleep at night, will destroy your marriage, will drive a wedge between your relationships with family members, and will cause you to resent and eventually grow distant from your friends who are NOT living with Autism.
See, normal isn't real.
Normal is what most people say they desire but almost no one can say they possess.
ABA or whatever path/treatment/therapy you select for your child with Autism is not about "normal". Its about helping your child be successful and thrive and overcome obstacles.
There are other parents out there who have it WAY worse than you, and there are other parents out there who have it way better than you. That will always be the case. The sooner you can let go of your own idealized version of normal, the easier the journey gets.
I have a niece with special needs and physical handicaps, and as an ABA professional I could choose to look at her as a series of deficits and strengths, or skill sets to improve upon, but I just see her as my lovebug. Thats it. There's things she can do, and things she cant do, just like everyone else. Guess what? None of us can do every single thing we desire to do.
A shift in your perspective is the key to escaping the "normal" trap.